Challenge your beliefs.

You don't get what you want in life. You get what you expect. 

From the moment we're born we begin to form beliefs about life, the world and the way it works. These beliefs are informed by what we see here and experience. They come from the people around us, the events we experience, and how other people react to them.

As those things come down to chance, the beliefs we form about the world also come down to chance.

This belief system can be referred to as our 'model of the world'.

Our model of the world has a huge impact on the way we live our lives.

Therefore, the way we approach life comes down to chance. In some ways, it's decided for us.

Here are some examples of views that you may hold about the world, consciously or not:

• Money is hard to come by
• Building a business is hard
• Marriage doesn’t work
• Success requires hard work and sacrifice
• Loving my job is unrealistic
• Having children is stressful

Some of these examples may resonate with you, you may even believe that some of them are facts. They are not - they are ideas and perspectives. But it's important to understand that they dictate your behaviour.

Most of the challenges in your life come down to your beliefs. They impact you in two ways:

1. You unconsciously behave in ways that make your beliefs a reality
2. You interpret your reality in such a way that it represents your belief

EXAMPLE

Person A grows up with parents who 'came from nothing', they worked hard to forge successful careers, climb the ladder, and achieve wealth. So, they form the belief that: success requires hard work and sacrifice. 

They find themselves working very hard and sacrificing a lot to become successful. They feel sure that their sacrifice was the only way for them to become successful and every time they consider a different approach, they see reasons why they can't. So, they keep sacrificing to maintain the success that they have built. A self-reinforcing cycle is created.

Person B grows up with parents who in their ways, 'caught a break' early in life - one followed their artistic passion and reached the top of their field, the other made some smart investments which paid big. So, they form some beliefs about success, such as success is straightforward, or there are many paths to success, or follow your passions and your instincts and the money will come.

So, Person B follows this method, they look for evidence that it's working and they keep trying it until it provides the results they want.

We all see and create evidence to support the ideas that we believe to be true. 

(We get what we expect).

Person A and Person B both create success, but they both have very different lives. 

Person A works very hard, sacrificing their personal needs and other areas of their life. Person B has a more harmonious, balanced life - taking time of and allowing themselves to live, alongside their success.

I picked one example to work through. But there are thousands of beliefs dictating the way your life. 

If you want to change your beliefs, consciously question them. Analyse them. Dismantle them, re-frame them, and reconstruct them until they serve you better.

The examples I used can be true - you will have proof and evidence for them. That doesn’t mean they have to be.